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NASB | Numbers 28:11 ¶ 'Then at the beginning of each of your months you shall present a burnt offering to the LORD: two bulls and one ram, seven male lambs one year old without defect; |
AMPLIFIED 2015 | Numbers 28:11 ¶ 'Then at the beginning of [each of] your months you shall present a burnt offering to the LORD: two bulls, one ram, seven male lambs one year old without blemish; |
Subject: The Sacred Romance |
Bible Note: Greetings VR - I commend you for recognizing your experience of grief over your husband - yet in reading your post I was drawn to this statement, "But I hunger for more. I hunger for a husband who will influence towards God not alway from him. And I feel caught up in a tug of war." I'm wondering if your desires are not tinged a bit with self. You see, we often believe that if others will change, if they will "get right with the Lord," etc, then our lives will improve; we will be happier or we will be in a better position to grow spiritually. Please understand, I am not detracting in any way from the Godly grief that you feel over your husband's back-slidden conditon! I have felt the same way . . . yet God showed me that I am not responsible for his spiritual growth . . . we are ALL accountable before the Lord (Romans 14:12) Consider the possibility that the tug of war you are feeling is between your desires (the hunger you identify) and God. God knows your needs and HE will meet them, how He does this is up to Him; He can even use your husband's spiritual condition to accomplish this!(Phil 4:19) So often we "think" we know HOW God "should" meet our needs when He has something else in mind. Another thought for you to consider: the circumstances that you are going through are not just about you - but about your husband and family too. Over the years I have realized that God has used me to accomplish HIS purposes in someone else' life. Yes, the circumstances that I went through were painful, but they were a means that resulted in God being glorified. Is this not what life is to be about?! If the Lord wants a purse, he can make a silk one out of a sow's ear (my Grama's expression). . . and yet how often do we try to tell Him how to go about it? Sometimes we may even try to hand Him the "silk"! These are just some things to consider in your relationships. I applaud you for desiring to walk with the Lord and be sensitive to the things that grieve His heart. Blessings, mommapbs |