Bible Question:
First of all, I committed adultery and have since repented completely, I thank God for his forgiveness and restoration. My issue is my wife is divorcing me, and I want to reconcile and to be the Godly husband that God has commanded me to be. When I was in the sin I did not believe that God had a plan for our marriage, but through the word and good teachings at church, I know that God does have a perfect plan for marriage and not only that he has anointed me to be that Godly husband through the Agape love in me. My wife believes because of Matt 5:31-32 that God has given her the choice to stay married to me or not to. She has chosen not to because she says that because God wants for her to be a Godly and submissive wife that this would be too hard for her and then she would be in disobediance to Gods word. I would never want her to be disobediant to God and I know that God has enough grace to help her and I through the mis-trust and fear. I just do not believe that she is standing on the right scriptures in this because everything I know about Jesus is Love, Faith, Forgiveness, and restoration. She also quoted Mark 10:12 that says if a wife divorces her husband and marries another commits adultery as a allowance for a wife to divorce. I know that if the divorce does go through she will not marry again. I also believe that if we do divorce I will not marry again either. I have looked for any other posts with this same situation and can't find any. For now I stand on my confession of faith that my wife will forgive and reconcile me. In God Mark |
Bible Answer: I want to encourage you to stand firm in your faith, despite the pain you feel. I, too, am a repentant adulterer, but my outcome was overflowing with the grace and mercy of our God. You do not mention what your marriage was like prior to your committing this sin, so the pain caused her may be running deeper than you know, or are capable of admitting. The scriptures you have mentioned appear valid and your wife's thoughts seem reasonable, but how do we reconcile Galatians 6:1? "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted."(NIV) I personally believe this text is not only warning of possibly falling into the same sin, but I believe it is warning us against the danger of unforgiveness. Once you repented, God forgave you (1John 1:9)and you were made whole. You need to continue in prayer for your wife, but make sure it is in the spirit of humility. Remember that she may still be going through the stages of grief, and you did hurt her deeply. When fellow believers suggested my wife should have left me, I asked her why she stood by me. Her response changed my life forever. She simply said, "I see the man that God sees." My prayer is that your wife will begin to see the man God sees. |