Bible Question:
Am I still "Married" in Gods eyes? I was married to what I believed was a Christian Man. We had hard times, he had a bad temper and was extremely controlling. After 2 children and 5 years of marriage, he ended it. He basically drug me through, kicking and screaming. He was NOT cheating and neither was I. I didn't feel we had a scriptual divorce, so I was willing to separate while we "worked" on it, but he just wanted a divorce and be done with it. And he got it! Texas, you can do that! So, now, It's been a year and a 1/2 since he left and about 5 months since final divorce and I don't know how to feel. I have NO husband, he's not here, he doesn't want to be here, but we didn't have a scriptual divorce. So am I still married to him in Gods eyes? Am I still "bound" to him? I have no evidence or even possibilities that he is with or has been with anyone else. He still attends his church Sundays and Wed, and volunteers at the Church functions, he is the "perfect little christian" to everyone else. So what am I to do, as a Christian Woman. Wait for him to go have sex with someone, then I'm no longer "bound" to him? That may NEVER happen. I have not dated or seen anyone, of course. I am focusing on the kids and my church and God. Letting him guide me, but I just feel so lost... like I'm in limbo or something. I don't know if I am able "as a Christian Woman" to let the marriage bond go... And since "God joined us together" in marriage, doesn't HE have to release us... I'm not feeling that... is it just me... or what? What should I do.... |
Bible Answer: The Right to Remarry I know what you mean by "still 'married' in God's eyes", having heard this phrase all my life. And I can appreciate your question. Yet I know of no Scripture that actually SAYS a divorced person is "still 'married' in God's eyes". What I do know is: After a divorce one's status is: divorced. Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. NASB 1 Corinthians 7:15 'God's utter hatred of divorce is very clear in Scripture. 'Nonetheless, there are two extraordinary cases in which Scripture teaches that God does permit divorced people to remarry. 'First, note that Jesus Himself included this exception clause: "Whosoever shall put away his wife, *except it be for fornication*, and shall marry another, committeth adultery" (Matt. 19:9, King James Version, emphasis added). He allows an exception in this one case, only "because of the hardness of your hearts" (Matt. 19:8). Clearly, Jesus is treating divorce as a last resort, only to be sought in the case of hard-hearted adultery. 'The apostle Paul (writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit) allows one more reason for divorce: if an unbelieving spouse abandons a believer, the believer is under no obligation in such a case (1 Cor. 7:15). This would free the abandoned spouse to remarry. 'But we must emphasize that apart from those two specific, exceptional cases, divorce is not sanctioned in Scripture.' (Source: www.gty.org/IssuesandAnswers/archive/divorce.htm) Scripture clearly gives two cases in which there is grounds for divorce, which carries with it the right to remarry -- adultery and desertion. More extensive answers to this question are available in John MacArthur, The Fulfilled Family (Chicago: Moody, 1981); and, The MacArthur New Testament Commentary: Matthew 16-23,(Chicago: Moody, 1988). See also the book "The Right to Remarry" by Dwight Hervey, Hardcover (September 1975), Fleming H Revell Co; ISBN: 0800707583. This book is now out of print, but may be available at amazon.com. Grace to you, Kalos |