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Results from: Answered Bible Questions, Answers, Unanswered Bible Questions, Notes Ordered by Verse | ||||||
Results | Verse | Author | ID# | |||
1 | How do you "honor" lying parents? | Bible general Archive 1 | searchingfortruth29 | 39349 | ||
We have talked to them numerous times about it. Every time we have tried to respectfully come to some type of resolution we are confronted with harsh words and little effort from their end to reconcile. The only reason my husband and I can come up with (why they are doing this) is because they wanted to make themselves look "right" to the rest of the family and garner pity and support for themselves. Yes, we are able to show that the parents are lying on several things - other things turn into a "he said, she said" type of deal. Our church does not presently have a pastor - actually, we are in search of a new church since they have succeeded in turning many in the church against us. These people that they turned against us (family and others) only listened to his parents stories and formed opinions without even bothering to talk to my husband and I (eventhough are private matters should not be of their concern). Even when people started calling us about it, they would not listen to us when we said the lies aren't true. The parents are still lying and causing trouble for us to this day - and others are following suit. | ||||||
2 | How do you "honor" lying parents? | Bible general Archive 1 | EdB | 39378 | ||
There appears to be more to this story than your telling. The parents must have some basis for what their saying or else others wouldn't be so willing to listen. If you know what is the basis for their lying, what can you do about removing that from the mix? In other words there has to be something they are focused on, what can you do to remove that and possibly making ammends? Is there an elder in the church? If so go to them and have hear your side of the story and see if they will get involved as a unbaised second party. If this situation is left unchanged you and your husband are going to find yourselves the outcast of the family and left without any needed support. I would do anything that is needed short of compromising a principal to make ammends. EdB |
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3 | How do you "honor" lying parents? | Bible general Archive 1 | searchingfortruth29 | 39449 | ||
There are so many details to the story that it would be hard to tell it all. I don't feel that it is a safe statement that just because others are willing to listen that it means that the parents must have some basis for what they are saying - many times people are willing to listen to things that are sensational - that doesn't mean they are true. The mother is falsely accusing me of yelling at her, calling her names and falsely accusing my husband of letting me do those things right in front of him among other things. My husband and I have been married for a little over a year. After being around his family for a short period of time, it became apparent that they talked about people when they weren't around, saying things that weren't nice and usually unfounded (especially the other daughter-in-law). From very early on, I made sure that I watched my words closely and also made sure that my husband was around when I talked to any of them (especially his mother). My husband has been there every time I talked with her - never have I called her names, yelled at her, talked to her in a disrespectful manner, etc. She told her husband and the rest of the family and members of the church these lies about my husband and I for whatever reason. We don't understand either. Even my husband said he doesn't know if she "has it out" for me or what. Eventhough it should not be everyone's concern, my husband has made the statements over and over to those concerned that I did not do the things she is saying I did. None of them will listen to him and say that his words and thoughts are not his own (which implies that I am making him say and do things that he doesn't want to say or do - which is an insult in itself). At this point, I am not sure what an unbiased second party could do for the situation. If she erroneously insists that we did all the things she says we did, how would an unbiased second party change anything. We will never say we did those things because they never happened. We already feel like outcasts of the family with everyone believing her stories and insisting that we don't know what we are talking about. | ||||||
4 | How do you "honor" lying parents? | Bible general Archive 1 | EdB | 39459 | ||
This could turn into she said you said. Let me make a suggestion. The next time the church, your family and you are all together, why don't you go up to your mother in law and say I don't recall ever saying those things, but since your sure I did I want to apologize to you right here and now and let us restore the relationship. Then bite your tongue and apologize making a promise that you will do everything possible never to show her or your father in law any disrespect. That will force her to either end her tirade about you or make herself look foolish. Sure it will be humbling, sure it is unjust, sure your right and she is wrong. But once again think of David and King Saul. David was absolutely right Saul was seeking unjustly to kill him but David gave him honor and God saw that David’s action did not go unnoticed. David was vindicated by the hand of God! As you will be if you humble yourself to make peace, because God has promised to lift up those that humble themselves in His sight. I pray you find peace and happiness, with just a year of marriage you many obstacles to get past, God will be with you if you seek Him. Make peace! EdB |
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5 | How do you "honor" lying parents? | Bible general Archive 1 | searchingfortruth29 | 39492 | ||
If I did that it would give her another reason to do it again. As far as a "she said you said", my husband (her own son) has been there through all of this and he, too knows the truth. When he came forth and said that her story was incorrect, she said he was brainwashed (by me). It is difficult for me to believe that "honoring your father and mother" means to permit them to do and/or say whatever they want (as hurtful as it may be) in turn for my husband and I to apologize every time. This is our first year of marriage and we are setting boundaries - we don't want to advocate this type of behavior and provide a breeding ground for it to happen again and again. We have humbled ourselves many times by tolerating their hateful phone calls and interactions as we were trying to make peace with them by resolving this. God does know where our hearts are. Thank you for your advice and suggestions. | ||||||