Bible Question: How do I forgive my dad for the wrong he has done to me, because I gave my life to GOD? And I am happy, but I have this void inside me even though I have asked GOD to forgive me? |
Bible Answer: I don't necessarily know what your dad has done to you, whether it be mentally or physically, but I can share my story with you and it may shine some light on your situation. Here goes: My mother left me when I was seven years of age, which, in turn, resulted in devistating affects. I can still remember being dropped off at my fathers house and her telling me not to cry about her leaving and to be strong. Remembering the moment when she drove off in her car and rounded the corner was the worst moment in my life. I ended up sitting at that window asking why she went away. Why she seemingly didn't love me. If it was me. I sat there until bed time for I believe three days unitl realized what had happened. I got extremely depressed. She came back. Only when I was nine. She did the same thing again, ended up leaving while I was attached to her, but this time I did cry. I cried in fear, hatred, anguish and pain. My heart felt like it was going to stop it hurt so much (The reason I am being so dramatic is because it has to do with what happened next). I came to know who Satan was...and I loved him. I became a Satanist and, in my personal opinion and I believe my step-mothers' as well, I was possessed. But then there's the good part. I went to church a little more than 3 years later, which led me to a conference called Dare2Share, which has led Satan to hate God and me even more. I became a Christian in 2003 and am now 16, however, becoming a Christian didn't solve all of my problems, it only gave me a link to God through Jesus Christ. My father(physical) taught me many valuable lessons, but I like this one the best. That a life is meant to live. But that life that you yourself are living now is a life that is going to get harder. People will ridicule you for your faith. People that are "of the world," as Jesus said in John 8:37-47, are "of Satan." Jesus' life in general shows us that those who do not know that He is God will resist what is righteous. That's why it gets so much harder fro Christians but yet, at the same time, it's so much easier. We as Christians know a God who will take care of us and will give us peace and strength. That's where it becomes easier at the same time. God takes away our burdens if we ask Him to. Now, back to my experience. Since I grew up having the train of thought that I was the reason my mother left, Satan had me convinced that God had to forgive "me." This was true but Satan is the chief of all liars and he perverted the truth. He didn't give me the whole truth. God did have to forgive me in order for me to be in the presence of Jesus Christ, but there was another reason He had to forgive me. He had to forgive me in order for Him to listen to me because God wont participate in sin. Only recently did I really start forgiving. I still had a burden on my heart. I was still convinced that it was my fault my mother left. But it wasn't. I asked God to forgive her for what she had done to "me" and to help me forget that it happened (When I say "forget" I mean being able to move on). I may not ever literally forget what happened but I'll tell you this much. I felt more free than anyone on earth at that moment because that burden was no longer being carried. That's what you have to do. You have to ask God to forgive your father, no matter what he did to you. Then ask Him to help you "forget." Then, after all that, "allow" God to take you from there and move you in right direction because I can tell you right now that every testamony of yours has a purpose, whatever it may be. Allow God to come to where you are now. Allow Him to meet you where "you" are. Not where everyone else wants you to be. |