Results 1 - 3 of 3
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Results from: Answered Bible Questions, Answers, Unanswered Bible Questions, Notes Ordered by Verse | ||||||
Results | Verse | Author | ID# | |||
1 | How does the church respond to abuse? | Jer 5:31 | Hatshepsut | 86509 | ||
I have a question or rather a comment concerning domestic violence that I would like to hear others perspective on. My husband was an evangelical minister in the church. Our entire family, including our six children, were heavily involved in ministry. Two years ago, I left my husband and moved to another state almost 500 miles away because he became more and more violent. He was psychologically, emotionally, mentally and even sometimes physically abusive to me and the children. He was also sexually abusive to me. When I went to my pastor about the issue, I was made to feel as if it were my fault. Sadly, most women in communities of faith are made to feel this way, thus they stay in abusive marriages. I thank God for his power of deliverance through His word. It was only through the Holy Spirit's revelation of the word that I learned that my Father in heaven did not condone my husband's behavior or the church's turning a deaf ear to my cries and the cries of my children. I have forgiven my husband, my pastor, and all those who kept silent. My question is this: The Bible speaks very clearly about domestic violence, yet communities of faith still treat women as if they are cursed. When will the body of Christ wake up and realize that the curse Eve (woman) was cursed with in Genesis, was removed at the cross? Why do we continue to teach women to be "submissive" under any and every circumstance and yet not teach men that submission, as Ephesians speaks about it, is a two-way street. Biblical submission is not just commanded of women, but of men also. Sumbission is also not synonymous with subservience and dominance. One submits out of love and respect. It is not submission if it is forced. There are many women sitting in churches today condemned to die with plastered on smiles and spirits that have been destroyed. What is the church going to say, what is the body of Christ going to do about the issues of domestic violence that are running rampid and largely unchecked in communities of "faith". |
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2 | How does the church respond to abuse? | Jer 5:31 | Mommapbs | 86510 | ||
Greetings - I am saddened by your experience yet rejoice with you for the healing of your spirit that has taken place. Your question about physical abuse within the community of faith is indeed serious, yet it stems from a larger issue - spiritual abuse. Thankfully, we have civil laws that we can turn to for protection and NO WOMAN should feel that this is NOT an option for her because God has established ALL authority! (Rom 13:1) Paul speaks about the authority we SHOULD find in the church,(2 Cor13:10) authority that is given by the Lord BUILDS up. However, in many churches today, this is not the case. (Jer 5:31) Bottom line is this, until the church deals with the abuse of their spiritual authority, situations like this will remain and possibly flourish. You took a stand and relied upon God - now as you look at the scars left by the past, what do you see, the wounding or the healing? I encourage you to keep your eyes on Jesus the author and finisher of our faith (Heb 12:2) - He will be your encouragement and will direct you in the way you should go. Do get a copy ot this book: "The Subtle Power of Spirtual Abuse" by Johnson and Vanvonderen May God bless you as you cling to and depend upon Him, mommapbs |
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3 | How does the church respond to abuse? | Jer 5:31 | Hatshepsut | 86513 | ||
In response to mommapbs, I was nearly in tears as I read your answer. It is very affirming to know that there is someone out there who won't sidestep the issue but will deal with it with real answers. I will definitely get the book you recommended. You also gave me more insight as I hadn't thought much, although I had read some in doing research on domestic violence, about spiritual abuse. There isn't much reading material out there concerning domestic violence in communities of faith. I am looking forward to reading your recommmendation. As to your question of whether I see the wounding or the healing - yesterday I lay on the floor relaxing and talking with a friend of mine. We were listening to Yolanda Adams singing "While Riding Through The Storm". In my former life, I was a praise dancer. As I listened to the song, I remembered a dance that I had "performed" to that piece. I smiled, though, when I remembered the storm of secretly stealing away from my home, where God brought my children and I, and how we are doing now. That song is so much more real to me. Today we have no electricity, I don't know how I'm going to pay the rent, and I am currently unemployed. In spite of all of this, I have joy and peace because I have seen God work so many miracles. I see the healing in my 7 year old son who, when I brought him here, was very violent. He is now a distinguished honor roll student entering a special program for gifted children. He wants to be a pastor when he grows up. My 11 year old has been an ambassador and conflict mediator for two schools this year. My 8 year old is less afraid and more loving than ever. My 17 year old, though still very troubled, is learning to take baby steps in the direction of her goals. My 18 year old son, now a man who lives outside of the home, is recognizing his need of God. Before we left, he believed he needed a gun. I do not really know how my 13 year old stepson is doing, but, if nothing else, I hope I have taught him by my leaving that abuse of any kind is not acceptable. In regards to protection from the law, there was none for me. I was told that if I took my children out of state, my husband could legally come and get them because he is their father. I was also told that I must sit down and mediate with him (while I was still living with him) concerning custody. You cannot mediate with a madman. I left against the counsel of the church and the law. God protected us legally, physically and spiritually. Much later, my husband and I mediated the custody of the children. It is my determined purpose to serve as many women and children as possible that live or have lived in the same situations. I have finished a book and am working on a series of books to aide those involved in domestic violence and to teach churches how to recognize and effectively counter domestic violence. I am also working with community organizations to increase awareness of the long term effects of verbal and psychological abuse. Again, thank you for your response. |
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